Why Marriages Fail. Marriages in the Christian community are failing at an alarming rate. This is both shocking and disturbing because it means that we as Christians are not walking in the fullness of God’s plan.

Why is this happening? There are several reasons why marriages are dissolving some are small issues and others a little more serious. We will do our best to give you as many as we can. Are you ready?

Reason #1
Why Marriages Fail

Both partners come into the relationship with unrealistic expectations of the other person, this always creates problems in marriage. These expectations are formed by media, society, our experiences, and family up bringing.

Let’s look at some of the unreasonable expectations we sometimes bring into marriage:

  • The husband is suppose to have all the answers
  • The wife is suppose to stay at home
  • I can change my partner after we get married
  • The husband should make more money than the wife
  • Marriage means sex anytime I want it
  • The husband is the boss
  • If I can just get married, I’ll be happy
  • I can be married and still live like I did when I was single

Reason #2
Why Marriages Fail

Many people get married with the wrong motives. In other words, they get married for the wrong reasons. Let’s look at some of them:

  • They believe If they get married they’ll be better off financially
  • They mistake infatuation for love
  • They mistake lust for love
  • Sinless sex
  • In order to please family
  • Because of a pregnancy
  • Because it just seems like the next logical step
  • Because most of my closest friends are all married

Reason #3
Why Marriages Fail

The two individuals have two completely different set of values. Another way of saying it is they’re unequally yoked. Being unequally yoked can apply to more than just religious beliefs:

  • Different religious beliefs
  • Different upbringings
  • Different goals
  • Different personal habits
  • Different beliefs regarding marriage
  • Different beliefs regarding raising children
  • Different perspectives on life
  • Different visions of the future

Reason #4
Why Marriages Fail

You fail to appreciate your mates God given differences. Instead you label your mates differences as character flaws.

  • My husband is too laid back
  • My wife is too aggressive
  • My husband is too messy
  • My wife is too organized
  • My husband is too analytical
  • My wife talks too much

Reason #5
Why Marriages Fail

You fail to leave and cleave as the Bible instructs in Genesis 2:20-24

  • The husband places his mother in the position where his wife should be
  • The wife runs to her parents’ home when ever there’s a problem in the relationship
  • The husband makes frequent comparisons between his mother and his wife
  • The wife tells her mother/other relatives about their personal problems
  • The husband seeks marital counsel from his mother/other relatives

Reason #6
Why Marriages End in Divorce

You think the problem is your mate when the problem could actually be your flawed thinking. You fail to see your own faults.

  • If my husband/wife would only __________ I would be happy
  • If my husband/wife was more like __________ this marriage would work
  • If my husband/wife could only see how wrong they are, we wouldn’t argue so much.
  • If my husband/wife was more mature…
  • If my husband/wife read the Bible more…
  • If my husband/wife prayed more…

Perhaps the biggest reason why Christian marriages fail is because couples fail to govern their marriages according to Christian principles!